Navigating the perils of polarization by Torben Bergland
Torben Bergland, M.D., is a psychiatrist and an associate director of the General Conference Health Ministries Department.
“I just want to be an ordinary person!” Those were the emphatic words of my four-year-old niece. We, her uncles, a theologian and a medical doctor, were asking about her aspirations. We were stunned. Don’t you want to be something special, exceptional, best at something? Shouldn’t you at least try to be better than your peers? Just ordinary—that’s so devoid of narcissism!
Extremism becoming mainstream
Dear niece, our world seems to be moving away from the ordinary fast. Polarization is everywhere, especially in politics and religion, at a baffling speed and intensity. Moderates who used to contribute stability through willingness to dialog, negotiate, and compromise responsibly and respectfully, are becoming rare. What used to be fringe and extreme is becoming mainstream with strong opposing currents to be swept up by carrying us away from one another. So far that though we occupy the same space, we are not living in the same reality.
Becoming an extremist may sound like something that requires intentionality and hard work, but it comes rather naturally. Many effortlessly drift into extremism, and when caught up in a current, it may take them very far. As they drift away and any opposing current weakens, they typically become more dedicated and zealous. The purer and more undiluted your current is, the faster and deeper you’ll be carried into extremism. Staying out of extremism is what requires intentionality and effort!
What extremists are
There are many kinds of extremists, but they are surprisingly similar. They may differ wildly in their beliefs and practices, but how they feel, think, operate, and relate to others and their needs and motivations, are much the same. Beneath the surface, you’ll often find a desire to affirm a sense of superiority or escape from a sense of inferiority. These are typical manifestations of narcissism.
Extremists do not recognize how ordinary we all are and that we can have community despite our differences. They typically see others as inferior to themselves and diversity as a threat to their existence.
Life as an extremist
Becoming an extremist is easy, but living as one is hard. They so narrowly define how everybody should think and act that nobody is capable of complying perfectly. In the discrepancy between what they proclaim, pretend to be, and what they indeed are, there is worry and stress about being found out and lying to themselves and others to cover up the gap. They partially deny any guilt and shame they feel for being “fake.” The rest they project on others. They may consistently, without evidence, accuse others especially the ones they define as enemies, of the “sins” they themselves are guilty of. When encountering an extremist obsessed about some sin or fault in others, I wonder what they themselves are fighting or covering up. Though they are typically critical and harsh toward anyone, they are sometimes incredibly tolerant of evils committed by their allies.
Dear niece, as you probably have realized by now, psychologically, morally, and relationally, the lives of extremists are quite messy. Being “ordinary” is the best way to go if you want peace, happiness, and genuine love.
Becoming an extremist is easy, but living as one is hard.
Torben Bergland
Extremism Self-Test
If you want to see how you “extreme” you are, try the extremism self-test.
Use it to see how you measure up. These are the attitudes, convictions, and behaviors you need to cultivate if you are going to become a genuine extremist. Remember, supremacy is what you’re really after. The ideology is secondary, a means to gain and portray supremacy. With extremists, sometimes the only visible ideology is “Self.” But, of course, you should make it appear as if ideology is what it’s all about. That was Lucifer’s strategy in heaven, and it still works surprisingly well.
You should start with the characteristics listed first and then build step by step. Unless you have laid a firm foundation by taking the initial steps toward extremism, you probably won’t master the advanced ones. But, as I’ve said already, many of these traits come quite naturally to us as human beings. The more you have of them, the easier it will be to develop the others.
Extremism Self-Test*
Yes
No
Us-versus-Them Mentality: Do you often think in terms of “us” (people who are like you and share your beliefs) versus “them” (people who are unlike you and do not share your beliefs)?
Recruitment: Are you actively seeking to spread your views, beliefs, and practices with the intent of making others adopt them?
Certainty: Do you prefer clarity over nuance, quickly form firm opinions and beliefs about most things in life, and feel confident about categorizing them as either good or bad, right or wrong?
Confirmation bias: Do you primarily get information from sources that support and reinforce your beliefs, or those of your group?
Dogmatism: Do you believe your views and beliefs, or those of your group, are absolutely and unquestionably true?
Isolationism: Do you avoid and dissuade interacting with or listening to people or sources who have different beliefs and practices than you or your group?
Supremacy Thinking: Do you believe you or your group are better than others because of what you are, do, or believe?
Enemy Identification: Do you have a clear understanding of who inside or outside your group you can trust, and who is a threat against your interests, beliefs, and existence?
Conspiracy Mindset: Do you believe certain people, groups, or institutions are secretly and maliciously plotting against you, your group, or others?
Propaganda: Do you strategically disseminate information about you and your group with the intent of promoting your interests rather than accurately and truthfully representing a nuanced reality?
Obscurantism: Do you ignore, dismiss, hide, or attack information that refutes your beliefs or critiques your actions?
Dehumanization: Do you consider those who differ significantly from you or your group to be of inferior ability and worth, or inherently evil?
Gaslighting: Do you strategically seek to make people distrust their senses, reason, and memories if these contradict the version of reality you prefer them to have and believe in?
Authoritarianism: If you have the power, are you willing to impose your will against the interests and freedoms of those who differ significantly from you in traits, beliefs, or practices?
Scoring (total)
Interpretation 2 or less “Yes”: Low risk; likely to tolerate diverse viewpoints and perspectives. 3-4 “Yes”: Moderate risk; consider reflecting on the balance and openness in your beliefs and interactions. 5-7 “Yes”: High risk; significant potential for extremist tendencies. Reflect deeply and consider seeking diverse perspectives or professional guidance. 8 or more “Yes”: Very high risk; strong indications of extremist thinking. It is crucial to seek professional help and engage with a broader range of viewpoints.
What extremism leads to
History teaches us of the outcomes of extremism. Extremists, political or religious, grow fruits on the same old tree. Ultimately, they rot as they ripen. What Paul called “works of the flesh” (Gal 5:19 ESV) are commonly seen in extremists: “sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these” (Gal 5:19-21 ESV). Since there are many kinds of extremists, you’re unlikely to find every sin represented in every extremist, but as it ripens, extremism seldom fails to reveal its sins. Jesus said that “a bad tree bears bad fruit … nor can a bad tree bear good fruit” (Matt 7:17-18 NKJV). If the fruits are bad, we know that the tree is bad.
What being ordinary leads to
Dear niece, if you stick to being ordinary and stay humble and honest, the Spirit may be with and in you. Then, your fruits will grow on a different tree. In Galatians, Paul listed the fruits from the Spirit’s tree: “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Gal 5:22-23 ESV). I’m joyful as I see these good fruits growing in your life more than a decade after that “I just want to be an ordinary person”-conversation.
Prevention of extremism
And, dear reader, if you have lost your appetite for extremism and want to prevent it in yourself and your group, then listen to the counsel of the Spirit: “Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself” (Phil 2:3 NKJV). What Paul urges here opposes any extremist’s supremacy mindset. There is no supremacy of gender, race, nation, religion, or anything. One human being is never entitled to assert supremacy over another.
Christ came as the servant of all, not the ruler. When the disciples argued about who was the greatest, He rebuked them, saying: “Yet I am among you as the One who serves” (Luke 22:27 NKJV). He who was above us took a position below us so He could be with us as one of us. That was the incarnation. “You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being” (Phil 2:5-7 NLT).
How different from Lucifer, who said, “I will climb to the highest heavens and be like the Most High” (Isa 14:13 NLT). But the fate of the devil will be the fate of every supremacist: “Instead, you will be brought down to the place of the dead, down to its lowest depths” (Isa 14:14 NLT).
If you want to be an extremist, be like the devil. If you want to be like Christ, let extremism be far from you. Before God, we are all the same. There is no one or nothing supreme except God; therefore, there’s no justification for extremism.
*This self-test has been peer-reviewed but has not been scientifically validated.
As the news came in of the shooting of little children at Robb Elementry School in Uvalde, Texas, hearts began to break…again. Lives were changed forever…again. Little sweet precious lives were cut short…again.
Gone
Gone was a playful summer in the Texas sun for little bright-eyed children. Gone was their future! Family relationships, laughter, fun at the carnival, education, opportunities, professions, marriages, their own children, the smell and taste of a good meal, the peaceful feeling of a desert sunset, growing older and wiser… All gone in a flash by a crazy young man. His future is gone, too, by his choice. Individual choice is a powerful thing! It can create good results or lead to murder. The big question is this: How do we help young people make the right choices. More on that later.
The sad finality for these children stabbed the heart of people all over the world. Little lives who were one-moment writing on fresh tablets were now bleeding out on the floor. If they were fortunate, it ended quickly.
One deranged, immoral, uncontrollable 18-year-old found some sort of sick satisfaction in using a gun meant for use by soldiers at war to end innocent and helpless lives. Salvador Ramos purchased his semi-automatic rifles within a week of his 18th birthday! He couldn’t wait to buy those weapons. All legal, but all so wrong.
As a society, what could we have done that would have prohibited all this? The answer to that is highly complex. There is not one thing that can be done. Even if there were not a single gun in this country, evil and mental sickness would find a way to destroy life. This horrendous act of murder began in his mind…then came the weapon of choice and availability. The connection between the sick, immoral mind and available weapons is the issue. Weapons for self-defense and weapons of offense are the two different motives for owning guns.
Frustration
The frustration of the deadly redundancy and pitiful failure of our divided country to “fix the problem” was on the faces of the officials in Texas. The president of the Un-United States and his vice-president began their predictable drift into vexation, political innuendos, and customary statements that “something has to be done.”
American Wisdom and Politicians
This problem of school shootings is not a political party issue. It is a societal issue. Regardless of party affiliation, religion, or no belief system, I have found there is wisdom among the diverse people who live, work, and die in this country. They are not politicians. They are common people who have common sense. They see that a solution will not be found in a single bullet. It is not one piece of legislation; it is not a partisan solution; it is not the elimination of guns and more governmental control of things they have shown they can’t control.
The wise among us know that protecting our young people, and people in general, from death by weapons has immediate requirements and then developing a plan for long-term solutions. They know that this takes a united effort where political hats and agendas are checked at the door. We all cry about the loss of unity in this country. In our lifetimes, we have seen unity come alive at the bombing of Pearl Harbor and New York’s twin towers. We have set aside our political theology at those times, focused on the enemy, and worked together.
Unfortunately, we have had many Pearl Harbors, and we are still wearing political hats with no serious solutions. We haven’t progressed towards helping protect our children and other human beings!
Progress on this problem is for serious people living in serious times. It won’t come from politicians. It will come from the people, by the people, and for the people. Let the wise among us stop waiting on the wealthy Politicians and the political ideologies that separate us!
The president said he was “sick and tired.” Americans are sick and tired too. We are sick and tired of rhetoric, worn-out words of condolence, efforts to comfort, and political positioning to make sure their party is elected or re-elected!
Movement
Every community in this country should start a movement. Don’t fall back on the comfortable couch of complacency. Let us gather the serious and open-minded citizens among us and create a group of people with one thing in mind: the safety of our children! Who will go first? Only the serious-minded.
The group leader must be a facilitator for discussion and results-oriented for firm action. Information is king. Understanding the dynamics of the problem comes first and quickly, then finding solutions for each of the contributing factors. The plan should have an immediate, short term, and long-term plan:
Here are some ideas:
For immediate attention:
1.) Vulnerability of the Schools- How do we protect our children at school, in the building, and out? This needs immediate attention, even if it is small steps at first.
2.) Alert Processes– How do we educate, encourage, and identify people who appear dangerous. There are all sorts of ways for those on social media to identify people who need help. But once they are identified, what next?
Moderate Term Actions:
1.) Mental Health-A highly neglected group in our communities are those with mental health problems. How can we incorporate community-wide programs to help people with mental health challenges?
Long Term Actions:
It is time to focus on practical subjects for students in our schools and leave behind special interest ideologies!
1.) Mental health classes and mental health experts must be added to the schools.
1.) Return the teaching of morals to our school. The government should never interfere with religious freedom. It is a basic tenant of our Constitution. But even if you are not religious, you know there are right and wrong actions. There are consequences for doing wrong. Just ask anyone in jail. Our local state and national moral laws are based on God’s law. Six of the Ten Commandments are moral directives. They are helpful to any person, religious or not:
*Honoring parents ( Why not have mental health classes relating to your Mother, Dad, Grandparents, etc.?)
*Murder. What this means to our society and the lives of others. There are other solutions than taking someone’s life.
*Adultery– Stress the importance of commitment to one mate. Commitment to right and honor is sadly missing in our society.
*Stealing. Understand how stealing is wrong and that there are consequences that will disrupt life. Teach respect for other people’s property
*Lying. Talk about its moral implications related to yourself and how it affects other people.
*Covetousness-Talk about the consequences of mental anxiety in desiring other people’s property, spouse, and property.
2.) Find more resources for mental health, especially for impressionable youth. Set aside funds to address the mental issues of children and people who are on the streets or in nice comfortable homes. Mental health affects everyone, especially those in High School.
3.)Gun control on the local level. Let the politicians do all the fighting about the 2nd amendment. In the meantime, let’s think about how we can control who get’s guns and who doesn’t in our community. Require background checks. You don’t want to give a gun to people with mental issues or crime issues. This won’t solve the problem, but it will be a vital part. Training for both practical and moral use of a gun. Make the classes necessary for owning a gun.
Think about this: Automatic weapons have been banned since 1986, while the slightly slower semi-automatic and bump stocks are not. These types of weapons are for the military, as are rocket launchers and tanks. Since we are given the right to bear arms, it does not mean an individual should have weapons reserved for soldiers. My feeling about the 2nd amendment is that it was written for its time to maintain a militia that could fight against a rogue government. While we are guaranteed to bear arms, it doesn’t mean we should own weapons of mass destruction. Just my opinion…
When you meet with your newly formed group, discuss the facts of the matter and come to agree in the context of protecting our children. Then move forward with rapidity. Time is of the essence. The next sick person is out there somewhere waiting for his opportunity,
Think less about your adult self and more about the children.
Discussion Question Examples for Your Group
Here are some discussion statements to consider. They are discussion questions only, with the objective of getting on the same page of protecting our children.
1.) What can we do immediately to protect all our schools? We may not like this answer, but it is worth discussing. How can the teachers at the school protect the students and themselves? Is having a locked safe under the desk with a gun a possibility? A politician stated that “hardening the schools” by arming teachers is just “adding more guns” where accidents will happen. But an unlikely accident is not going to kill 19 children!
2.) How can we use the police and other resources in our community to protect the innocent and vulnerable?
3.) How can we monitor our communities, so we don’t tread on the sanctity of the home but become more aware of dangerous conditions around us. How do we react?
Last Thoughts
What were the last thoughts of those precious children? My wife, who is a nurse and has held the hands of dying people, including children, told me this:
I have seen my Creator, in His love and mercy, give a person at death’s door comfort. God especially sends comfort to children. Children have a special place in His heart. I have seen it in their eyes. Eyes looking towards heaven as if they are seeing an angel come to be with them.
Nurse Judy
God and Children
The question to God is often “why”? Why did God allow this? Stock answers are multiple but often make no sense and reflect badly on God. Because the answers don’t come from people who know the character of God, even if they are an elder or a pastor in a church. A person can be religious and not appreciate the God whose identity is described as love.
Bad responses:
“God loves them more than us and calls them home.” So God causes a mass murder to kill them so He can have them in heaven? Or a man dies of a heart attack and leaves a wife and three small children. So God clogged his arteries so He could have this young man in heaven? How ridiculous!
“God has a long-term plan that we can’t see.” It will save someone else. Really? Is this how God works? Is death the solution tool of God or of Satan?
“They are in a better place.” Of course, heaven is a better place, but it brings no comfort to those who no longer have their little sweetheart!
As a follower of Christ, I get frustrated with pat religious answers. I prefer the plain word of God and His revelation of great love:
1.) God does not take any enjoyment in death. Even the death of a wicked person:
“As I live, saith the Lord God, I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked; but that the wicked turn from his way and live…”
Ezekiel 33:11
“…but (God) is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.”
2 Peter 3:9
Death is not God’s tool. It is the tool of Satan himself:
The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy.
I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.
John 10:10
Children Need Him
But Jesus said, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven.”
Matthew 19:14
Have we prohibited the Children to come to Jesus? Children are our model for what it means to be part of the kingdom of heaven. As adults we must come to Jesus and learn how to bring our children to Him. It must be in the Spirit of the love of Christ and not the steeling cold theologies of religion.
If you do this, I will put none of the diseases on you which I have put on the Egyptians. For I am the Lord Who heals you.” Exodus 15:26
And the Lord will take away from you all sickness, and will afflict you with none of the terrible diseases of Egypt which you have known, but will lay them on all those who hate you. Deuteronomy 7:15
Some may view the following experience as only an anecdote and somehow irrelevant. but all of us mortals have had similar experiences, which changed our lives forever. Some in a good way. Some in a bad way.
In the year 1971, I was 20 years old and a newly-wed. That year, an unexpected tragic event changed my life forever. Julie, my new wife, and I were just starting out on our life journey. We were in the prime of our youth and eager to experience life. But a shift in our thinking would occur from the events of the day starting with the ringing of our phone.
Since that hot summer day, I began to get interested in superior, not just good, health and longevity (except for ten years when I had a death wish-another story for another time.). Our new health motivation started with a phone call from my wife’s mother, Dorothy. On the other end of the line was a frantic and out-of-control screaming. Dorothy poured out almost unintelligible words that we interpreted as, “Come to your Grandad’s house!!! I think he’s dead!”
After scrambling through the yellow pages, we found and called an ambulance. Julie and I jumped in the car and raced several miles from Madison to Goodlettsville. 911 was in its infancy and not well-known back then. Cell phones were almost non-existent.
When we arrived, the crowd of three or four were outside including Dorothy. They seemed to be afraid of some monster that had gotten loose in the house. They refused to go in. The ambulance had not arrived. After a few questions to the sobbing family members, I went inside to the small kitchen in this simple little country home.
There he was! Lying peacefully on his back next to the kitchen sink, like he simply laid down to take a nap. I took his wrist to feel for a pulse from the wrist of this mid-sixty-year-old man in his overalls. From the first touch of his skin, I knew he was dead. He was cold and slightly stiff. Of course, there was no heartbeat. This big gentle farmer had passed into eternity.
At the time I was an atheist and had few words of comfort for the family…or myself. I liked this quiet man. He never showed a dislike for anyone and came across to most people as shy and humble. He was not educated by today’s standards, but he had reserved wisdom not often seen in our crazy society.
Well, the ambulance came and they rolled his body out the door to the sound of loud wailing from his adult daughters. They were also simple and poor people. I had a difficult time relating to them and never came into a close relationship with them. My lose.
When we got home and the adrenaline faded, I began to think about life and death. It bothered me that one day I, too, would pass into eternity. I wondered about the day of my death… ”would my family come home and find me lying on the floor dead from a heart attack?”
From that day forward I began to explore how to stay healthy. After much reading (no quick answers from google back then), I turned to a life of exercise, athletics, and changed my diet to a vegetarian after reading a book called “Food for Fitness.” Don’t bother trying to google it. I think it has long since gone out of print. In one chapter, it described the healthiest people in the world…those who lived the longest. For the first time in my life, I heard about the Seventh-Day Adventist that followed the simple health principals given by God to the nation of Israel. With that kind of name, I imaged them to be some hippie cult living in the deserts of California. Years later, I would find them to be warm Bible Christians with a desire to let the world know what they knew. They were far from what I thought.
So my new life as an athlete and vegetarian began. I would overdo the exercise! Over the next many years, I would train to run long distances and run eight marathons at or below a 3-hour pace. This qualified me to run the Boston Marathon, which I ran twice. I also became an avid bicycler and eventually the president of a local bike club. To this day (age 68), I enjoy biking. My time was spent either racing our touring on my expensive bikes. Research is now beginning to reveal that endurance athletes are not that healthy in their later years. A simple routine of exercise is much better.
But, little did I know, that about five years after the death of my wife’s Grandad, this self-centered atheist would reach out to God as I road on a bike trip across an Arizona desert. A simple prayer for Him to reveal Himself to me would lead to an extensive study of the Bible. In its pages, I would find the health laws God gave to help his creation stay healthy and the Bread of Life that would give them eternal life.
Today, I am amazed at the fact that the wealthiest country in the world is not the healthiest. I am also amazed that Christians have all this great health knowledge at their fingertips, but minimize God’s words. There are multitudes of health plans and diets to keep its writers wealthy for a long time. But all (including Christians) have dismissed the health laws that God promised Israel would make them disease-free… if they would simply listen and obey. He said, I will… “take away from you all sickness, and will afflict you with none of the terrible diseases of Egypt which you have known.” Deuteronomy 7:15
Some say, “That was for the Jews only.” But I wonder, “how are their stomachs different than ours?” This is no anecdote! Today there are millions who live by the health principals contained in God’s owner manual. The result is longer, healthier, happier lives especially if they consume the Bread of life.
Salvation is not based on the food we eat, but God desires that we prosper in health just as our souls. Life is so much more productive and enjoyable if we are healthy. It even helps our spiritual lives. Our bodies are temples that can glorify Him not only in physical health, but mental, and spiritual health.
“Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.” 3 John 1:2
“…do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?” 1 Corinthians 6:19
“Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” 1 Corinthians 10:31
One day, all of us will pass away. But, I don’t want my family to find me dead on the floor. My desire is to be like Moses in this life,
“Moses was one hundred and twenty years old when he died. His eyes were not dim nor his natural vigor diminished.” Deuteronomy 34:7
My first wife, Julie, and I started to grow older with each passing of the day, just as all people do. She died of cancer this year. She now sleeps waiting for the day of the Lord. My ten years of a death-wish turned me from my healthy lifestyle. I ate and drank whatever I desired and eventually had a heart attack. My heart has never been the same.
But, several years ago, I returned to a healthy lifestyle. At age 68, I am more active than my peers and disease-free…hopefully forever. God’s grace and forgiveness are beyond words. We live in a dangerous and unhealthy world. This body is wearing down, but there are things we can do to make the journey from mortal to immortal better. Without a doubt, the death of a beloved Grandfather 1971 sent me on a journey that led me not only to a knowledge of the best health plan possible from God’s owner manual but to the Bread and Water (Jesus) that will give me eternal life. It is not an anecdote, it is the testimony of millions of people.
Next time, we will talk about the health plan from God. It will change your life and your experience with God…for the good.
